New Year
The New Year of 2021 has arrived. I have a process I use to end each year and begin anew. Though the process is simple, the impact can be transformational. Every action is intentional and planned. Simple but not easy. Complex emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.
Intentions are everything, as it always precedes action. A mental intention is set consciously or unconsciously before every action we take in our lives. Whether or not we are aware, our intentions direct our inward and outward actions.
Annual Retreat
Each New Year’s Eve, I go on retreat. Alone normally, but sometimes with a like-minded friend. I take minimal clothing and nothing that cannot fit in one small piece of luggage or a backpack. Essentials are two candles (one a taper candle and one votive). a fireproof container, a candlestick holder, a lighter or matches, post-it notes, and a pen.
In preparation the week before the retreat, I begin to pause, breathe deeply, intentionally, and write down the names of people I perceive have wronged me. Additionally, I include situations where I may have wronged or injured others either intentionally or unintentionally. One person or incident per stick up note. Deep breathing releases memories and situations long-buried or forgotten until breathwork brings them to the surface.
By mid-afternoon, I pour myself my favorite beverage. This year it was a wonderful Merlot my son had gifted me. The bed and breakfast I rented has a balcony. Dressed warmly in sweats due to the cold outside, I moved to the balcony that overlooked a wooded area.
As I sit the votive candle in the fireproof container and light the candle, I use my cell phone to play my favorite zone music, and then I pour a glass of wine.
Forgive and Release
One by one, I read the names on the post-it note pads and speak the name or circumstance out loud. I then drop the note into the flame and repeat the same phrase. “I forgive you and release all energy that I have around you.” Some names and situations take longer as there is more negative energy surrounding them. Some I have to bypass and come back to as I am not in a place to forgive and release.
Generally, the process can take as little as half an hour or as much as three or four hours depending on the depth of the wound or perceived injustice. But I do not end it until every note is burned and I have released the energy that surrounded it into the flame. I sit with the fire until it burns itself out.
This year, I scheduled a massage between the ceremony and midnight. The fireplace was lit and I slipped into a hot jacuzzi as a bit of baptism between the old and emerging energy. The masseuse and I are great friends, so he stayed until midnight and toasted the New Year with me on the balcony. The fireworks are indications, for me, of both the celebration of forgiveness and the entering grace and potential of the New Year.
Grateful
Following a peaceful rest in front of the fireplace, I wake up refreshed and unburdened. After pouring a glass of juice I sit the taper candle into its holder and light it. I use no music for this second half of the ritual. The gratitude ritual is spontaneous and unwritten. I speak into the room the things for which I am grateful, as they come to mind and I continue my deep breathing. When I feel the ritual coming to its own end, I speak my hopes and dreams out loud for the coming year.
Now, I begin each day of the new year by lighting that gratitude candle and speaking the things for which I am grateful that day.
What are your rituals to end one year and begin the next? If you have none to date, I would offer the suggestion that you create rituals in your life that allow you to release the negative and welcome the positive. Both light and darkness are essential to this ritual for me.
Blessings,
Harvey
